"Oh Dana"

"It's okay, Dana. You're still a lot smarter than me."

I certainly don't envy the life of a White House Press Secretary. You basically get in front of a microphone everyday and spew administration propaganda and lies. It's a lot like the Rush Limbaugh show, but without the convenient physical anonymity radio provides. George W. Bush is on his fourth press secretary in 7 years. His latest, Dana Perino, is a refreshing change of pace from the quick-witted, smooth-talking styles of Ari Fleischer, Scott McClelland and Tony Snow, Bush's three previous press secretaries. No, Ms. Perino kind of just seems lost up there. Instead of simply spewing out the pre-approved administration lies, which she does frequently enough, she often appears as if she's making stuff up on the fly.

Last week, Dana Perino drew the ire of Democratic lawmakers by labeling the 110th U.S. Congress as the "Do-nothing Congress." Perino made the statement to explain President Bush's marked decline in the use of controversial signing statements in 2007. In fact, in 2007 Congress passed 11 more bills than the Republican-controlled Congress of 2006. And the Democrats were able to get all this done in spite of the fact that seven out of the eight vetoes issued during the Bush presidency were issued in 2007.

So was this moniker dropped by Perino part of a concerted effort by the GOP to smear the Democrats in Congress? Certainly Dems have been accused (unjustly) of not supporting the troops and aiding terrorists, but the "Do-nothing" comment appears to be a creation of Perino herself. And if she had done her homework, she would have realized what an inappropriate and ill-informed comment it was. Despite intense opposition from the White House, this Congress still passed more bills into law than the more aptly named "Rubber Stamp Congress" of 2006.

Of course this was not the first time Ms. Perino embarrassed herself in such a fashion.

• In a January 2008 press conference, Perino eschewed a reporter's question about the looming recession and budget crisis, claiming simply that "math is not my strong suit.”



• Despite graduating college with a minor in political science, Perino admittedly does not know what the Cuban Missile Crisis was. On a December 2007 edition of NPR's game show, "Wait, Wait . . . Don't Tell Me," Perino retold the story of how she was flustered by a reporter's question about the historic event, saying she thought it had to do with "Cuba and missiles, or something." She later told her husband about her "deer in headlights" experience, to which he replied, "Oh, Dana." Perhaps we might not expect the President to know pertinent U.S. history, or be able to find Namibia on a map, but his official mouthpiece should be able to.

• Following the Virginia Tech school shooting in 2007, Perino was asked about the administration's stance on current gun laws. Perino said the best solution for combating gun violence is for people to just obey the existing laws:

The President believes that there is a right for people to bear arms, but that all laws must be followed. And certainly bringing a gun into a school dormitory and shooting,...that would be against the law and something that someone should be held accountable for.

• Downplaying the value of the Army Field Manual (which expressly forbids waterboarding as an interrogation technique), Perino said the manual is really only appropriate for "young GIs, some so young that they’re not even able to legally get a drink in the states where they’re from." The rationale, then, is that CIA interrogators (average age of 40) shouldn't be governed by the same code as the Army, essentially a bunch of rowdy teenagers. In fact, the average age of Army soldiers is 28, and the age of Army interrogators likely much higher. So Perino believes that two U.S. intelligence outfits should be governed by different codes of ethics because of perhaps an age difference of a few years.

I mean, come on Dana. Just come out and say you want to waterboard people, and we'll have at least some respect for you. But again, this isn't just smooth-talking propaganda, but some seriously bizarre ad libbing that makes you think "Wow. If she's getting this creative with her spin, she must really be hiding something." See, the Tony Snows of the world are cool customers. Snow was like a pre-programmed robot who never really got flustered and never deviated from the administration talking points, no matter how ridiculous they might have been. Perino on the other hand, seems to want to make her case stronger by going off the page with her answers, and we've seen the results of that.

I guess I prefer the Perino approach to the Snow approach. I guess it comes down to a personal preference for honesty over competence. While Americans have gotten used to both dishonesty and incompetence since 2001, it's refreshing to see someone who is woefully unqualified giving it their all for the team. And when being a good liar is the main qualification for the job, I guess I don't mind Perino's incompetence all that much.